


Understand

by UPlover



Category: Friends (TV), IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Ben Hanscom is a Good Friend, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Friendship, Gen, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, IT Chapter Two Fix-It, Inspired by Friends (TV), Jealous Richie Tozier, M/M, Mentioned Sonia Kaspbrak, Minor Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Talking, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-11
Updated: 2020-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:07:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22666009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UPlover/pseuds/UPlover
Summary: Eddie talks to Ben about his feelings for Richie.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 4
Kudos: 93





	Understand

Enjoying their Valentine’s Day party, the Losers caught up on their adventure ever since they defeated the evil in Derry only five short months ago. Ben and Beverly decided to have the big extravaganza at their big house, overlooking a beautiful pond. Now, it was getting close to night time. As adults, they could stay up as long as they wanted to unlike having curfews with they were kids. Finally, some of Ben’s work guests left and the Losers kicked back playing games. 

The house was so big that it was easy for one to get lost. At least, there was enough space to be alone if one needed to get away. Which was the case for Eddie, who quietly sat by himself in a small hallway listening to the Losers have fun behind the closed door. He listened to Richie laugh, something that the adored.

Ben opened the door and stepped out into the hallway, holding an empty drink in hand.

“Eddie?” he asked surprised to see the man all alone. He sat down next to him. Due to all the guests, he didn’t notice if anyone was missing. “What are you doing out here?”

Eddie cleared his throat, sitting up a bit. “Oh, just needed a little time to myself.”

“You okay?” Ben asked, looking into Eddie’s withered eyes. Ever since his fatal injury, Eddie was known to get tired easily. And there were other health risks, too if Eddie got himself too tired. “Want me to get Richie?”

“No, no, it’s fine. I’m fine,” Eddie uttered in the most unconvincing voice.

Ben sighed, letting themselves be quiet for a moment. Wow, it had been a while since he had a quiet moment to himself like this one. He could actually hear the crickets outside. There was a time he hated that noise trying to escape to his room so he wouldn’t have to listen to it. The loneliness was painful.

Eddie was staring off into space in this sad way, holding himself. “Are you sure that nothing is bothering you?” Ben asked him.

Sighing, he knew he couldn’t keep it to himself for much longer. “Ben, your parents loved each other, right?”

Tilting his head at the question, Ben had an understanding of where this conversation was going. “Yeah, they did,” he smiled at all the happy memories. “I loved their relationship. She was devastated when he died,” Ben remarked, frowning. So was he. That’s why he put his mother before himself at times which overwhelmed him when they first moved to Derry. On the days he spent along to himself, he lied saying that he was spending the day with friends to make her happy. 

Eddie broke out of his huddle. “Then how come my mom barely shed a tear when my dad died?”

“Do you remember him much?” Ben asked, feeling his heartbreak. It was interesting how little he knew about Eddie and his personal life. He joined the Losers Club late in the game. All he knew was that Eddie had an overprotective mother and not much else. They did bond telling stories about their late dads one day in the clubhouse. 

Shrugging, Eddie still fought through the confusion in his eyes. “I was only four. I just remember bickering.”

“Why is this on your mind, Eddie?” Ben asked, curious.

Eddie’s mouth twitched. “‘Cause I feel like I don’t know what love is.”

“What? Come on you-”

“I know what you are going to say! Yeah, I love Richie, but sometimes I feel like I’m not doing enough to make that known! And I was married to a woman who I didn’t love for like fifteen years! I just keep thinking about why my parents were even together. Did they love each other? And then when he died my mom was just so attached to me fearing that she’d lose me. Did your mom do that to you?”

Ben sighed, having to remember the awful memories. “In some ways, yeah, but she wasn’t one of those helicopter parents. She had to work a lot,” he smiled. “And then on the weekend, we’d have a special outing together. I always loved those days.”

Eddie stood up, pacing around the hallway, staring out the window. “I just feel so overwhelmed. And sometimes Richie is, too. He doesn’t admit it though, because that’s Richie. Do you feel that with Bev?”

“Ed, maybe you should talk to Richie about this,” Ben suggested. Of course, he wanted to help Eddie, but he wasn’t the right person for Eddie to be talking to.

“Ben, I love him so much,” Eddie smiled, looking into Ben’s eyes with this heartbreaking expression. “It’s just- so hard to let go of a life and a person you had to be for almost half of your life. I don’t know if Myra ever loved me. I only loved her because… she was everything my mother was. And yet my mom…” he trailed off. Richie’s laugh was so loud. 

“I don’t think she ever really loved my dad. Just me. But, there was this one moment, I still remember it when I was three. It was Valentine’s Day, and my mom gave my dad this gift. He loved it so much. And they kissed and… then that was it. It’s the only time I remember them being happy.” 

Eddie looked into Ben’s eyes, little tears appearing in the corners of his eyes. “Ben, I don’t want that to happen to me and Richie!”

“What don’t you want?” Ben asked him, placing a hand against his shoulder. 

“I want to love him!” Eddie teared up. “But, I just feel so confused like I’m not giving him everything. Oh, Ben, I’ve never felt happier in my entire life, but - “ Tears fell from his eyes and he just shook his head. “I don’t know!”

Sighing sadly, Ben opened his arms offering Eddie a hug. Warmly accepting it, Ben pat his back as Eddie sniffled.

That was when the door to the party room opened and Richie appeared. His smile disappeared faster than a bird flying away when a person took a step towards them. Briefly feeling a flame of jealousy when he saw the scene, his heart ached when he saw his love look so upset.

Ben gestured for Richie to come over, tapped Eddie to get his attention, and handed him over to Richie. Briefly meeting Richie’s eyes, Eddie clung to Richie who held him tightly. As if knowing what Eddie was upset about, he kissed the top of his head and leaned his own head down on his in comfort. They stood in silence for a long time as Ben left them alone to talk.


End file.
